Sloppy Church by Faith Christiansen Smeets

I was asked to write something “comical,” but I am inspired to say something quick and dirty about what I like to call “sloppy church” instead. Because it is oh-so-sloppy. And not because the Biblical Church or the Holy Catholic or Apostolic Church is sloppy, but because the “contemporary congregation” is lazy.

We can’t show up dressed, we can’t be bothered to commit or even show up on time, and we can’t seem to create anything of our own. It’s disheartening and it’s gross. We even copy mainstream music and call it “contemporary Christian” music—and most of it is terrible. A litany of disclaimers could accompany this little rant, but my hope is that someone will be inspired to really show up next Sunday and maybe other days during the week (since God created each day, and not just one, after all).

Here is a non-comprehensive short list of sloppiness—in no particular order and not because I am lazy, but because most people are and will not read anything more comprehensive than this:

1. Habitually showing up late. The ultimate sign of disrespect to all those who make worship happen on Sunday is to be consistently late on Sunday (or late to other church-related activities). In addition, it cuts into your own worship. It’s one day a week, and our particular service starts at a leisurely hour.
2. Prioritizing coffee. If you are addicted to caffeine and cannot function without it, that is something to be addressed at another time and place. But if your addiction keeps you from being timely and participating in worship, that is impossible to rationally excuse. Wake up earlier to deal with your addiction at home. It’s nice that our congregation sets out coffee for the addicted, but it should not be relied upon. Don’t be sloppy about it, slurping it, letting it spill, preventing you from shaking someone’s hand, or saying hello to someone. Don’t let it inhibit your ability to participate on Sunday mornings for less than two hours.
3. Too lazy to put on real clothes. This might involve trying to wear sweatpants/athletic shorts, beach attire, revealing a little too much skin, etc., because you cannot be bothered to show up for Christ. No one is better than anyone else for deciding to comb his or her hair, but what it shows is consideration and respect for the act of worship. It’s preparation. We should not dress up for others in the body. We dress appropriately for Christ, for the Institution, and out of self-respect. Don’t be sloppy because it’s Phoenix and we are “casual.” Taking advantage of that fact is also lazy. Wear your non-real pants or revealing top after church in the comfort of your own home.
4. Cannot be bothered to serve. We are desperate for nursery workers, greeters, cleaner-uppers, and the list goes on. Let’s prevent church burn-out by lending a helping hand. We are all benefitting from the hours dedicated by members; the freeloading on the backs of the church servants is also sloppy behavior.  
5. Sloppy with our suggestions. Nothing is perfect. We can complain or point to many obvious improvements that need to be made or to make sure this or that is executed in the best way. It’s whispered throughout the halls and sanctuary on Sunday. Why not come up with a solution or ask if you can be part of the solution? Complaining is lazy and ugly. Solutions are not.

The disclaimers that can be applied above and true exceptions are fairly obvious, but poor excuses are not exceptions. Take into consideration your dedication to church and Christ’s body. Take into consideration your role in the body. All parts need to be functioning and being lazy and sloppy is detrimental to not just you—but the body. But first take into consideration if you are being sloppy and lazy about Jesus.